What's wrong with Jamie?

"What's wrong with him?"  It's a question I get all the time.  The less bold among us ask my friends and even Jamie's playmates.  There are still plenty that ask me.  I usually spill something about Sensory Processing Disorder and how for a long time we thought he might be on the Autism Spectrum, but that he's not.  Curious people seem to be satisfied by my response, but I'm not.  I don't see what they see.  I want to grab these people by the shoulders and demand answers.  "Why, what did you see?"  I don't see it.  I see my little boy running around at the playground or in the fast food playland like all the other kids.  I see him doing all the things the other little boys are doing.  My own brother asked my friend if Jamie is "retarded".  The answer is a resounding, "NO!"  Here is an excerpt from the testing Jamie had at the end of last year...

Results of the DAS-II indicate that Jamie is functioning in the above average range of intelligence with a DAS General Conceptual Ability (GCA) score of 113.  The DAS-II is comprised of 3 clusters of skills.  Jamie's Verbal Cluster standard score of 113 was above average as was his Nonverbal Reasoning standard score of 112.  His Spatial score of 103 was average.  On the DAS-II Diagnostic subtests, Jamie's Working memory standard score of 109 was average and his Processing Speed standard score of 122 was well above average.

Jamie's Phonological Processing T-Score of 40 was in the below average range, however.  This score is equivalent to a standard score of 85.  Phonological Processing involves skills that underlie early reading decoding abilities.  It refers to the ability to take apart words into their individual sounds.  It involves rhyming, blending, deletion, and phoneme identification and segmentation.  With regard to reading decoding, Jamie's teacher reported that he relies heavily on his knowledge of sight words.  She said he does pretty well with letter sounds, but if he is not completely sure he knows a sight word, he makes a wild guess.  For example, he will look at the word "is" and say "truck wheels."  She indicated that he was slightly behind where she would like him to be.  I did not test his reading skills for this evaluation, as insurance does not cover it.  Jamie appears to be at risk for learning disability in basic reading skills.  His below average Phonological Processing is significantly lower than his above average intelligence.

But none of this explains what they are seeing.  Maybe the next time someone asks me I will ask them to have a seat and chat with me for a little while.

Skittles

We were on our way home and Bella just would not stop crying.  Jamie was whining about the noise while eating the skittles we had shamefully bribed him with moments early at the store.  I asked him what he thought she was crying for.  He said, "Maybe she wants skittles."

First Night in the Crib

Bella slept in her own room for the first time last night.  I had never even taken her in the room, much less left her alone in there before now.  She slept really well.  She woke up around 4:30 this morning for a bottle.  After eating she went right back to sleep and I put her back in her crib.  It seems a little strange for her to be in there.  She looks so small in her crib! She's three months old, though, and it's definately time for the transition.  I put the Sleep Nest on craigslist and it will probably be gone today.  **sniff**

Race Cans

I spent the weekend with my good friend and her children. Bless her for loving Jamie despite his quirks, mess, and the general chaos he can bring to a home. This weekend he convinced her son to "race" cans of sprite in the kitchen. One of them had a pretty harrowing crash and sprayed everywhere. So the solution to the problem was, apparently, to take a medicine dropper and shove it into the side of the can.

Peer Pressure

Jamie got into the biggest trouble he's ever been in this past weekend. I've been letting him go play with the kids up the street. They're all older than him, but one girl just turned 7 and he likes to play with her. He's not allowed to be in their house or back yard. I need to be able to look out and see him. We live on a dead end. The kids play in the road. They set up a basketball goal at the end of the street. I've known most of my neighbors my entire life. We watch out for each others kids. This family is new.

My husband goes outside Sunday to check on Jamie and sees him trying to place something under the tire of the neighbors truck as the neighbor is trying to back out. The neighbor sees him, thank God, and stops. He watches for Jamie to move out of the way and tries again and Jamie does the same thing again. This apparently happened a few times. My husband was screaming the whole time. I come running because I heard Matt yelling. All the kids from that household are standing there watching Jamie do this. Most of them are 10+. Some of them are teens. The neighbor is finally able to back up and I make Jamie come home, of course. The neighbor is furious. I'm sure he was frightened, too. He has a little girl in kindergarten, too. I demand to know what Jamie thought he was doing. He was trying to get Eeyore, which is his lovey, "smushed". I ask him why he would do that to Eeyore and he says, "Because my friend wanted me to." We have the "you don't do everything your friends want you to" discussion. I take Eeyore away so he can get a taste of what it would be like if Eeyore was gone. We discuss death and how getting hit by a truck or a car could make you die. I also told him that he couldn't go out without me again except in the back yard, which is fenced in and we lock. I am very concerned about this new family, but Jamie wants to play with them so badly. I left my car in Knoxville the weekend before last after a trip to the ER where they gave me morphine so I could not drive. I haven't had a car this week. I hear the keypad to my front door beeping and go up front to find the little girl trying to get into my house. Mind you, she is just barely seven. I just have a gut feeling that something is not right with the family.

Jamie had terrible night terrors Sunday night. I felt guilty about the death discussions and taking away Eeyore, but I really wanted to make sure the danger sunk in and for there to be a serious consequence to his actions that he would not forget. The little girl came up to see if Jamie could play and I asked her about what was going on up there. She said that she wanted to see what would happen if the truck ran over Jamie's Eeyore. She said that she and all those kids in the family had been running over his Eeyore with their bikes and had not been able to smush him. I told her that if she and Jamie could not play nice games together that I would not let them play together. I told her that he wouldn't be able to play without me there from now on and that he was grounded for three days. She still showed up three more times and then showed up after school yesterday, too.

Lately, Jamie has seemed really susceptible to peer pressure. He tries to give away the stuff he loves to make other people be his friends. He does whatever they tell him to do. He is immature for his age as it is and it's frightening to me to see him try to buy friendship in that way. I'm so worried about him.

Too Many Presents

I've been putting out a present a night under the tree to build up Christmas anticipation for Jamie. This morning Jamie informed me that I was putting too many presents under the tree and that there wouldn't be room for Santa's gifts.

Baby Bath

Jamie and I were watching Babies: Special Delivery and we saw a baby born. I'm hoping he will be there for the birth so we talked about the "yucky stuff" on the baby and how his baby would be yucky at first, too, but they would clean her off. Jamie said, "Can we put her in the bath tub? I love her in the bath tub."

Kindergarten Christmas Tree Project

Jamie had to make a Christmas tree for school. His teacher sent the paper already cut out and Jamie had to decorate it. He did this almost completely by himself. I had to draw a star for him to cut out and I had to show him how to tape the curling ribbon behind the tree, but that's all. I think it turned out quite cute.

O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree

I had wanted to put up our tree after Thanksgiving dinner, but since I am on bed rest I have little control over what gets done and when. Matthew was too tired to do it. A few days later he finally got around to pulling it out of the attic. Once put together we found that our poor pre-lit tree was no longer lit, at least a lot of it wasn't lit. I was so disappointed. Matthew went to the store a few days later and bought an inexpensive pre-lit tree. With the baby coming we couldn't not afford to put a lot of money in the tree. It was a little disappointing to look at it once it was put up. It is not very full. After being decorated, it cleaned up pretty nice, though. I am so happy to have a tree up and really enjoyed watching Jamie decorate it.

I stayed up late last night to surprise Jamie with a Christmas Countdown Calendar. I think it turned out pretty cute. I did it with a piece of green poster board. I used foam craft paper to make the ornaments and even cut out aluminum foil for the tops to make them look more realistic. If you've never tried to cut anything small out of aluminum foil you are really missing out on some fun (if you could hear me say that you could note the sarcasm dripping from my tongue).

Can a Mom Really be on Bed Rest?

It is difficult to see in this picture because the flash on Nathaniel's white fur obscured the marks, but Jamie colored our cat with green marker. He has marker on his face, neck, and paws. You would think you could turn your back on a coloring five year old for a few moments without something of this nature happening. Need I even mention the mess he made of the room and of himself?

Some Artwork and Writing

Trick-or-Treat

Trick-or-Treating was so much fun. It was drizzling and quite cold. By the time we were finished we were soaking wet. Even so we all had a blast and probably could have gone on longer.

Trunk or Treat

We went to a Trunk or Treat at a church with some friends a fe days before Halloween. I brought Dynisha with us. They ate, played lots of games. There was face paining but Jamie wouldn't have his face painted on so he asked her to paint his hand. It got ruined only seconds later when I held his hand without thinking. Dynisha chose to have her hair painted instead.

Jamie is getting older and much more adventurous. Even six months ago he was terrified of bounce houses and the like. He would watch the other children and you knew that he longed to participate in the fun, but just couldn't get past his fear. Tonight he actually played in a bounce house and a blow up obstacle course and had a wonderful time. I didn't think I would manage to pull him out to go home. I am so glad that he conquered that fear. Perhaps he will be bolder the next time he is afraid to do something that he really does want to do.

Chocolate Chip Cookies

• 1 cup of self-rising flour
• 1/2 cup softened butter
• 3/4 cup packed brown sugar
• 1/2 cup granulated sugar
• 1/2 tsp. vanilla extract
• 1 large egg
• 1 cup chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 375

Beat butter, brown sugar, granulated sugar and vanilla extract in a mixing bowl until it is creamy. Add the egg and continue beating. Gradually add flour and continue beating. Stir in the chocolate chips. Drop the cookies in rounded spoonfuls on a baking sheet.

Bake for approximately 10 minutes or until golden brown.

This made us 18 cookies, but will probably make you about 20. I think we ate a few in the dough stage!

Pine Cones & Leaves

I really had a good time with Jamie today. Today was the first day of him fall break from school. We slept in late. He slept in the bed with me last night. He started out in his own bed, but ended up in with Matthew and I. I don't mind. I love having him close to me. I went to bed after Matthew and when I got in there he was snuggled up to his Daddy and the two of them were taking up less than half the bed. Moments like that melt my heart.

We relaxed the first part of the day. I heated up some Chicken Tetrazinni that I had made last week and frozen. I got the recipe from www.moneysavingmom.com. It was really good. Jamie loved the cheesy noodles. I did some laundry and late in the afternoon we headed out to Jamie's school and hunted for pretty leaves and pine cones. At first we didn't have much luck with the pine cones. I started on the paths in the woods around the school and didn't find any at all. When we walked around the back of the school we found plenty, though. When we got home I dumped everything out on the table and let Jamie fill a clear glass vase. Then we pressed leaves between two pieces of wax paper. I don't think my iron gets hot enough without the steam setting for them to press well, but Jamie was happy with it. Now I have a lovely centerpiece on my kitchen table.

Now we're sitting on the couch watching Cake boss together. Jamie just loves that show. He's so facinated by the whole thing. He loves cooking shows, too, but nothing beats Cake Boss.