This blog is just about my life and mostly revolves around my son, Jamie. This blog is a combination of everything, whether it may be a new recipe I tried, a good freebie I found, something funny Jamie said, or feelings I'm having about life in general. There's little rhyme or reason. I'll never win any blogging awards, but I enjoy writing about our lives and I mostly do it for my son. It's so easy to forget moments over the years. I've got all these little tidbits of our life in print and I hope that someday Jamie can enjoy them.

I called this blog Mother of Life, Mother of Loss because of my issues with pregnancy loss and the joy of finally bringing this wonderful person into the world. Truly, I feel the pains of loss, but you won't see too much of that here. I am blessed and I am, above all else, a mother of life.

After all the years of infertility and loss, Matthew and I were blessed with a surprise pregnancy. We were pregnant with twins, but unfortunately, Baby A could not stay with us. Baby B grew into a healthy and happy baby girl that we named Bella Marie. We are so blessed to have two beautiful children.

Saturday, September 12, 2009

19 Week Appointment & Jamie's Shots

My 19 week appointment went fine. I didn't get an ultrasound, but we listened to the heartbeat and the baby is doing just fine. My OB said not to worry about pain in my cervix and spotting. That's all to be expected. He actually said the pain was good because with IC you don't feel it when you open and with the cerclage I'll definitely feel it ...if I start to dilate. My cervix is 2.5 to 3cm long and that's fine. We go back next Thursday, the seventeenth to have our ultrasound and learn the gender! I can't wait. There's not much new to report for now.

Jamie also had to go to his doctor Wednesday morning. He had to have a few shots. I was very proud of what a big boy he was. He didn't cry. When the nurse brought the shots in she asked him if he would get on the table and he got on it without any fuss. He said quite matter-of-factly, "I'm scared." He laid down on the table and held my hand and Eeyore. He did cry after he was actually poked, but he didn't scream or try to get away. I thought he did fabulous.

They weighed him and he weighed 42 pounds. He's growing so fast. He got to go with us to the OB appointment since it was directly after his appointment and there was not enough time to take him back to school. He kept saying that he wanted to go to the room with the screen. He wanted to see the baby. I told him that I did, too, but that we couldn't this time. He so sweet.

He told my mother yesterday that the boy had died but when the babies came out the doctor would put a shot in it's mouth and it would be alive again. We explain that the baby was gone and there would be only one. Sometimes it seems like he gets that, but sometimes he pops out with something that tells me he's still a bit confused, or maybe it's just a case of wishful thinking.

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