This blog is just about my life and mostly revolves around my son, Jamie. This blog is a combination of everything, whether it may be a new recipe I tried, a good freebie I found, something funny Jamie said, or feelings I'm having about life in general. There's little rhyme or reason. I'll never win any blogging awards, but I enjoy writing about our lives and I mostly do it for my son. It's so easy to forget moments over the years. I've got all these little tidbits of our life in print and I hope that someday Jamie can enjoy them.

I called this blog Mother of Life, Mother of Loss because of my issues with pregnancy loss and the joy of finally bringing this wonderful person into the world. Truly, I feel the pains of loss, but you won't see too much of that here. I am blessed and I am, above all else, a mother of life.

After all the years of infertility and loss, Matthew and I were blessed with a surprise pregnancy. We were pregnant with twins, but unfortunately, Baby A could not stay with us. Baby B grew into a healthy and happy baby girl that we named Bella Marie. We are so blessed to have two beautiful children.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Always Scared

I'm 18 weeks and 4 days now, but still find this pregnancy terrifying. I think I might have felt the baby a few times but I'm unsure. I think I should feel more by now. I have an appointment on Wednesday and I'm nervous. It's easy for me to convince myself that this baby is not alive.

Often I feel pinching and pressure on my cervix. I'm not sure, but I'm assuming this is normal with the cerclage. I haven't had any real bleeding.

Anyway, just wanted to post a quick update on how the pregnancy is going. We'll be finding out the gender soon. I am looking forward to that.

1 Remarks:

Poohgal79 September 8, 2009 at 12:35 PM  

I'm wishing you peace in his pregnancy. Can't wait to find out what you're having!!