This blog is just about my life and mostly revolves around my son, Jamie. This blog is a combination of everything, whether it may be a new recipe I tried, a good freebie I found, something funny Jamie said, or feelings I'm having about life in general. There's little rhyme or reason. I'll never win any blogging awards, but I enjoy writing about our lives and I mostly do it for my son. It's so easy to forget moments over the years. I've got all these little tidbits of our life in print and I hope that someday Jamie can enjoy them.

I called this blog Mother of Life, Mother of Loss because of my issues with pregnancy loss and the joy of finally bringing this wonderful person into the world. Truly, I feel the pains of loss, but you won't see too much of that here. I am blessed and I am, above all else, a mother of life.

After all the years of infertility and loss, Matthew and I were blessed with a surprise pregnancy. We were pregnant with twins, but unfortunately, Baby A could not stay with us. Baby B grew into a healthy and happy baby girl that we named Bella Marie. We are so blessed to have two beautiful children.


Tuesday, September 9, 2008

When Mommy Can't Comfort

I hate it on the nights that Jamie wakes up and you can't console him. Those nights have gotten fewer and far between, but it's so frustrating when they happen.

He woke up around 2:00am crying. I went to him and picked him up. He settled down and I took him to my room. He said he wanted to go up front with Daddy. He often goes to sleep on Daddy in the evenings when they watch TV together. I took him to Matt and he tried to settle in. It seems he could not get comfortable and soon started crying uncontrollably.

Matt brought him back to bed with me and I tried rubbing his back. He kicked and cried and said he was hungry. I offered him different light snack options and he said he didn't want any of them. He climbed out of bed and ran to his play room. There he stood crying. I tried to comfort him but he didn't want me to mess with him so I went up front to let him have some time to calm down. I kept going back to check on him every couple of minutes. It's hard to know exactly what you should do when this happens because you want to do something to sooth your child when he is so upset.

He ran down the hallway to his bedroom, then to the back door and hid behind the bookcase. I asked him if he wanted to watch a movie and he said no as he ran back down the hallway to the playroom. I went back up front to give him his space. He quit crying and I went to check on him. He was in the bed in the playroom asleep with both of his Eeyores. His little legs were pulled up and crossed. Poor little fellow was just so sleepy he didn't know what to do with himself.

If my camera was charged I would have taken a picture of him in the strange sleeping position. I covered him up, but didn't risk kissing him, though I wanted to so badly. He tossed a little when I did it and stretched his legs out. I thought he might wake again, but he didn't. He's sleeping peacefully. Hopefully he'll sleep good through the remainder of the night.

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