This blog is just about my life and mostly revolves around my son, Jamie. This blog is a combination of everything, whether it may be a new recipe I tried, a good freebie I found, something funny Jamie said, or feelings I'm having about life in general. There's little rhyme or reason. I'll never win any blogging awards, but I enjoy writing about our lives and I mostly do it for my son. It's so easy to forget moments over the years. I've got all these little tidbits of our life in print and I hope that someday Jamie can enjoy them.

I called this blog Mother of Life, Mother of Loss because of my issues with pregnancy loss and the joy of finally bringing this wonderful person into the world. Truly, I feel the pains of loss, but you won't see too much of that here. I am blessed and I am, above all else, a mother of life.

After all the years of infertility and loss, Matthew and I were blessed with a surprise pregnancy. We were pregnant with twins, but unfortunately, Baby A could not stay with us. Baby B grew into a healthy and happy baby girl that we named Bella Marie. We are so blessed to have two beautiful children.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Shame On Me

It's time for a little "shame on me" moment. I've been giving in to sleeping with my son every night. I must admit, I love sleeping with him, but I should be sleeping with my husband in my own bed. Last night I slept in my own bed and it was nice until crying began in the wee hours of the morning. "Mooooommmyyyyyy!!!" Matthew actually dragged himself out of bed instead of me. I was just so tired. He returned to our room, "He wants you to sleep with him." I grabbed my pillows and went. I didn't get to go back to sleep. Jamie kept telling me he didn't want me to sleep with Daddy and that he loved me.

So, it's past bedtime. Jamie's asleep and I've finished watching American Idol with Matthew. I asked Matthew what he thought I should do and he said I should probably sleep with Jamie. We all lose sleep if Jamie wakes up crying. So I think I've started something that's going to be hard to fix. I know what I have to do to fix it, but I just don't feel like it right now. How horrible is that?

I'm going to bed... with Jamie. Good night.

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