This blog is just about my life and mostly revolves around my son, Jamie. This blog is a combination of everything, whether it may be a new recipe I tried, a good freebie I found, something funny Jamie said, or feelings I'm having about life in general. There's little rhyme or reason. I'll never win any blogging awards, but I enjoy writing about our lives and I mostly do it for my son. It's so easy to forget moments over the years. I've got all these little tidbits of our life in print and I hope that someday Jamie can enjoy them.

I called this blog Mother of Life, Mother of Loss because of my issues with pregnancy loss and the joy of finally bringing this wonderful person into the world. Truly, I feel the pains of loss, but you won't see too much of that here. I am blessed and I am, above all else, a mother of life.

After all the years of infertility and loss, Matthew and I were blessed with a surprise pregnancy. We were pregnant with twins, but unfortunately, Baby A could not stay with us. Baby B grew into a healthy and happy baby girl that we named Bella Marie. We are so blessed to have two beautiful children.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

A Good Day (For the Most Part)

Today was a pretty good day. Jamie woke up before anyone else. He said he didn't want to go to school at first, but then seemed to forget that he didn't want to go. Matthew loaded him and Dynisha into the van and I watched anxiously out the window to see if there would be a struggle when the bus arrived. We gave him his Eeyore to carry and see if that helped.

He got on the bus with only a slight hesitation. Matthew told me that in the van he told him that he loved Mommy and missed Mommy. What a heart breaker. Dynisha pepped him up about school and told him how they would go to school together next year. She said she would walk him to class.

When I went to get him off the bus in the afternoon it was sleeting. I had to stand in the icy rain for about 15 minutes. I thought ahead of time and brought a blanket to wrap Jamie in when I got him off the bus. I folded it as tight as I could and tucked it under my arm to keep it as dry as possible. When the bus finally arrived I was pretty well soaked and had little ice pellets stuck to my sleeves. The bus driver opened the doors and invited me in a little to get warm. Jamie came and hugged me. He was all smiles. He asked me where Dynisha was and I told him that she was still at school. He accepted this without fuss. I wrapped him in the blanket and walked him home. It's only three houses down the street, but it was freezing in the sleet. He told me all the way home how much he loved me, "I love you apple. I love you cupcake. I love you ice cream. Mommy, you're my best. I love you banana."

We came in and I asked him about his school day and he actually told me a few things about his day. He still wouldn't tell me what he had for lunch. I like to be sure he's eating. I think I'll ask his teacher if he's eating okay. He keeps telling me, "I don't eat. I just play." I suspect this is not true, but I better check.

When Dynisha got home they played on the computer for a little while and I called them to help with some housework. The two of them helped me clean some of the floors and the bathroom sink. I finished preparing the guest room for Dynisha and she is sleeping in her own room tonight. She is happy, but Jamie is not. He cried himself to sleep saying, "I want Isha. I want Isha!"

He asked to go back to Sprout Studio today. I tried to explain that it was gone so we couldn't go back. He didn't quite get the concept. He didn't cry or anything. I just think he believes that I'm telling him a fib.

The icing on the cake today was getting his drum shirt in the mail. This was our favorite shirt last winter. We all adored it. I had looked for it on ebay at the beginning of winter but it was priced outside of what I was willing to pay each time I found it. Every time I didn't get it I was sorry, but thought I would eventually find it at the right price. I quit trying to get it months ago. On a whim I checked for it again and there it was for $10.00 or best offer. I offered $8.00 and got it ($11.00 shipped). When I opened the package and showed it to Jamie he grabbed it out of my hands and hugged it, "My drum shirt!" He wanted to put it on immediately but I told him that he could wear it to school tomorrow.

*The picture is from last year. I kind of miss his long hair.

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